Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
God I need to hump something, right now.
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