That's intense
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Randomize
