He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
