Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
