my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
