Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
