So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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