This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
