p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
