I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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