How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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