So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize