it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize