so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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