..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
