Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize