This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
