She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Randomize
