Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
