its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
