were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Randomize
