I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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