Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
