all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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