There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
