Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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