No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize