it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
