The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize