Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
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