So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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