he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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