i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
You've changed since you got that strap on
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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