wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
