i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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