just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
