I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
