i would punch a child for taco bell
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
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