better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
