I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
