I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you win again, gameday.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I would ride that face into the sunset
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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