Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
