He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize
