You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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