i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
