Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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