My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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