Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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