Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
she looked like the before picture.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
The air taste purple.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
