No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
