Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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