Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i wish my penis had a tongue
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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